I lie on the floor bawling my eyes out.
Wishing that I didn’t fuck up again.

Feeling better off dead.

Praying for someone to take my soul.

Praying for him to forgive what a terrible person I’ve become.

Cheeks raw from tears.

Body heaving, overwhelming pain.

Black stains my face.

Loneliness screaming in my ears.

What else is left for me?

I’ve lost the one who has kept me going.

Yearning for something to distort my reality overtaken by hell.

Do I call and risk him hearing me cry?

Does he know the pain I caused upon myself?

Will my heart pain to see the gifts he bought for me?

Will I find myself breaking down when I see him again?

Kicking myself for hurting him.

Will I be okay someday?

Or is this the end for us and me?

I’m not sure I can keep living like this


 
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